The word “why” may be my favorite word. This is because I actually believe that there are reasons behind all things. And asking why could help me satisfy my curiosity. There are quite some things better left unsaid, people say. I believe in that, too. We need to be able to tell when to find out and when to keep silent. And surely it takes wisdom, for sure.
I got asked this question some days ago,
Why do you think God placed you where you are right now? Have you got the answer?
The question made me think. And I actually came up with an answer. I said yes, I think I have found the answer to that question. Yes, I have found the reasons and God’s actually revealing more and more to me.
God’s actually been changing me into a different person I knew I was. I am fully aware that I am a totally different person by now. I was actually that high mountain who always looked down to others, I was actually that cocky lady who always thought that I was better than others. I only made friends with the ones I thought were good enough. Such a shame on me. I realized by now that I am nothing but a flower, here today and gone tomorrow. I thought I was good enough. I thought my achievements were definition of who I was. I thought I was superior and others were inferior.
Damn! I deserved nothing but to be condemned.
God’s been revealing this bleakest part of me and I believe that he is still at work. I couldn’t believe that I was such a person!!
Well, I actually could have ended up somewhere else instead of here. Somewhere better, somewhere more comfortable, and somewhere with easier challenges. But God has something better in store. According to his mercy, he has brought me here. He has been peeling layer by layer all my bad and change it with the new one.
I’ve got to admit that there was that denial deep in my heart. I actually pretended to be happy having to go here back then. I was so good at pretending. I was real good at wearing masks. But God has unmasked me and nothing is hidden before him. I am naked and there is nothing that he doesn’t know about me.
Today, almost two years passed. I have found the reasons why God brought me this far. And I believe that there’s more. God’s got something more in his head.
So, wherever you are, whatever situation you are in right now, God’s got a plan for you. Too many times God speaks to us but we hear nothing, because we’re too busy and in fact, we’re living in a noisy world. Pause for a little while, take a look around you, and listen. God’s got something for you to learn. God’s actually working in you now, you’ve got to take some time to realize.
*photo was photographed and edited by superriska*